what i have and haven’t done

Despite all rumours to the contrary, I haven’t been abducted by aliens, I’m not in some out of the way hospital with amnesia and I’m not lying dead in a ditch.

Although, when I look around the house right now I’m seriously tempted to run off and join the circus…

I’ve just been… busy.

The kitchen is… not quite happening… I’ll have an update on that soon.

The living room looks like the dogs are running the household. They’ve trained me to do the washing but they’re really useless at folding and putting clothes away. Eh. That’s ok. The baskets of clean clothes fill in the spaces in the living room which would otherwise look bare and boring.

The guest room… well, let me put it this way: I went in there to find something the other day and got pinned under a stack of boxes. If the dogs hadn’t found me I think Wayne would have wondered why I’d left him till the smell gave it away.

The office looks like my brain exploded.

Yeah. Really. Every project, every little thing I’ve kept cause ‘it’ll come in handy one day’ or ‘I have plans for’ is on the floor. Every available surface is covered in ‘things to finish’, ‘things to sort’ and ‘things to put away when I find a place for them’. When you walk in there you have to shuffle so you don’t step on anything sharp.

I went in there the other day to clean up so I can find the paperwork I know I need to do, but I was so overwhelmed by the site, I gave up. I just didn’t know where to start.

I think I need to move.

How do people manage?

I mean it, how do people manage to do everything that needs to be done? I know I’ve asked this before, but no one is giving away their secrets.

I’m only working 3.5 days. And I groom dogs which is really another job, but its at home so it almost isn’t like having a ‘real job’. You’d think I’d have tons of time to DO things, right? Well, I thought I’d have tons of time to do things.

But I don’t.

Sometimes I know its cause I’m just too tired or worn out by the heat (have I mentioned I hate the heat?) to lift a finger. Not to even fold washing.

I had such big plans for this summer. I was going to finish painting the house – then found I had a great excuse to put it off… after all, I can’t paint till the new kitchen window goes in, right? I was going to paint the rails on the porch… At least I managed to wash an section of them today so I can (hopefully) start painting there this weekend so the potato vine can start climbing instead of grovelling. I planned to ride more. Or ride SOME. I planned to make stuff for the next market. ha. I planned to do up a couple of old pieces of furniture…

I guess I should consider the few things that I have done and not beat myself up about it. I’ve started a kitchen renovation. I’ve patched up the bathroom to make it more user friendly without actually remodelling it. I put in garden beds (by organising someone else to do the work) and grew a lot of my own plants from seeds. I (we) got the driveway and dam fixed. I (we) raised ducklings. And got geese. And a miniature horse. I got Dancer broken to saddle and have started riding her.

So I’ve done tons.

Why do I feel like I haven’t done anything?


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